Imaginary Bad Breath

Apparently, it’s not always clear whether someone actually has bad breath, even to doctors. So things like this have been invented. Though note the Wikipedia page on the Halimeter®: it is “an adjunct method for determining halitosis (bad breath, oral malodor) levels, alongside human assessment of odor levels (the latter is considered the gold standard).” In other words, the nose knows. 

The pigeon isn't imagining anything. 

This brief (one-page) article from the renowned British Medical Journal is everything you ever did (not) want to know about the phenomenon of bad breath and its weird sister, imagined bad breath.

Real And Imaginary Halitosis

Author(s): Clifford Hawkins

Source: British Medical Journal (Clinical Research Edition), Vol. 294, No. 6566 (Jan. 24, 1987),pp. 200-201

Memorable Quotes: The first question to ask yourself when confronted with a patient who complains of bad breath is: "Can I smell it?" (200)

[I]maginary halitosis is worse than real halitosis for it can become an obsession that dominates the victim's life and turns him into a social outcast. (200)

[T]he flavoured belch of the aerophagist is usually pleasant and depends on the previous meal. (200)

[T]he breath can provide an invaluable clue to a doctor when faced with a patient first seen in coma: the fetor hepaticus of liver failure is like the smell of mice or a freshly opened corpse; uraemia produces a fishy ammoniacal smell; and diabetic coma an acetone odour like sweet apples or hay. (200-1)

Strange Findings: Those who imagine they have bad breath are likely to suffer from hypochondriasis, depression, temporal lobe epilepsy, or schizophrenia. (200)

“Morning breath” is an effect of there being little or no movement of the mouth and saliva during the night which cleanse the mouth during the day. (200)

They used to prescribe enemas for bad breath! (200) I wonder if that was why Gandhi enjoyed them...

If you rub garlic on your feet, you will get bad breath. Also, you will be kicked out of my house. (200)

Regular use of mouthwashes increases your risk for thrush and resistant strains of bacteria. (201) Reader beware: the link contains some gross pictures. 

If you find you may be suffering from actual bad breath, here's another Brit who weighs in on the matter. He's a dentist, so you know he's experienced. 

As always, you can get the full article in PDF form on Ziddu.